#EnoughIsEnough – Stop Raping Women
It’s over 72 hours since Ugandan women on Twitter spoke out about their rape stories or anonymously shared rape stories of Ugandan women, and the conversation is still ongoing. Unfortunately, this is not the first of such stories nor will it be the last if things continue as they are.
Rape apologists and potential rapists continue to ask the usual moronic questions; ‘Where is his (the rapist’s) side of the story?’, ‘How do we know she(they) is(are) not lying?’, ‘Why come to Twitter instead of reporting to the police?’, ‘What was she wearing?’, ‘Why did she go to his place?’ … I wish these were all there were, but there are many more, and each one worse than the last!
The bottom barrel of all the comments are those alluding to feminists blowing things out of proportion, and merely outing rapists for clout. Because to them, rape seems like something that we are talking about out of the blue, and or for retweets and likes. A tweet talking about how all this ‘rape jazz’ is ruining the New Year good vibes left me speechless, and that’s saying A LOT after everything I have since read.
Yesterday, evidence of the injustice that women have faced at the hands of the same police that rape apologists are recommending rape cases get reported to was released, and I don’t have enough water left in my body for crying in this January heat!
The worst thing about all of this is that women have been saying all this for years, and rape apologists have continued to ask for evidence. Even now that we have what might be more evidence in one-time frame than ever before, the response is still the same – women have been accused of making false accusations, women are being asked for more evidence, women are not believed, society does NOT care. Period!
Did you know that men have a 0.00321% chance of being falsely accused of rape? The chances of being struck by lightning are 0.0083%. In comparison, men are more likely to be struck by lightning than be falsely accused of rape.
While we are on the subject, have you ever heard of a man listing a false rape accusation as one of his biggest fears in his life? The answer is probably no, because men are not in any active danger of this being their reality, and they also know it.
Considering the number of times a comment of false rape accusation is thrown around every time a rape story is shared, you might be wondering how often men have been falsely accused of rape. The answer is 1.5 – 10%. Make a quick Google search if you think I am making this up. Regardless of the continent, the highest number of false rape accusations registered is 10%.
Now, I am no Mathematician but if 90% of rape stories are true, why would anyone lean towards the side of the rapist instead of the rape victim? Please make it make sense!
Over the years, a post about what women would do if they had one day without men surfaces, and the replies from women are ALWAYS simple things like jogging at night, drinking without having to watch their back, and wearing clothes that they want without thinking about where they are going.
Every time I get back to my home, I let out a huge sigh of relief that I made it back safely. I don’t stay out at night if I don’t have someone to take me home – otherwise, there is not enough FOMO in the world. I see a man walking behind me, and my first instinct is to hold my bag tightly and increase my pace. For women, ‘text when you get home’ is not a statement said just for just, it is a lifeline because literally anything could happen to us. This is the reality for many women.
As women, we are reduced to taking measures that men have never had to think about for a day, which is why it is gravely insulting when people (usually men) suggest measures for women to take to avoid being raped. Women wearing mini skirts have been raped. Women wearing baggy jeans have been raped. Women wearing hijabs and burkas have been raped. Children as young as 3 months in diapers have been raped. Children wearing school uniforms have been raped.
The only common denominator in all of this is MEN! Rape is not about what a woman is wearing, whether she is drunk, whether she asked for it or anything else that society/men want you to believe. Rape is about power, and rapists know this. There is not enough cautionary living that women can do to protect themselves to not get raped. Rapists are calculating, and will stop at nothing to abuse women, whether they know them personally or not.
So we shall continue doing what we have been doing; we will believe women when they share their rape stories, we will expose rapists and rape apologists on social media until their throats are sore from telling us to report to the police and threatening defamation suits, we will cancel rapists and rape apologists, we will not let them into our spaces, we will not let them continue to walk around as though they are accepted members of our society.
We will not stay silent.
WE. WILL. FIGHT!
To all the women who have been sexually abused, we are sorry.
To every woman who has shared their rape story, we believe you. We are on your side. You are not alone.
To every woman who wants to share their rape story but hasn’t yet, don’t feel pressured into sharing it. Take your time, and work on you first. You don’t owe anyone your story.
To all rape victims, may you find the healing that you need. Please seek the help that you need.