Waking up suddenly, Tim heaved a sigh of relief that it was only a dream. He really needed to be bring his A game for that interview because getting this job was a life or death situation.
‘How is it that life can be so cruel?’
He felt terrible for even thinking that, it’s not like he had not had a hand in ending up in this exact situation.
He remembered it like it was yesterday;
‘I took the test, it was positive’
He didn’t have to ask Bel what she was talking about it. They had had sleepless nights when she realized that she might be. They didn’t say it out loud, that would only have made it more real. Like that had helped.
Lord knew he loved Bel but children? He shuddered at the thought.
Not that he didn’t love children, on the contrary. He was the favorite uncle to all his siblings’ children but this was quite not the same.
He had always been the stronger one emotionally so he would not let her see his frustration, it would break her and that’s the last thing he wanted.
He had been saving for awhile from all his freelance gigs and he would have been able to open his own studio but that was
on hold off now with a baby on the way.
He had had a childhood without a father so he would have to be dead before he let his child go through that; he’d move the world to ensure that he/ she didn’t have a childhood like his.
They still hadn’t decided whether to keep the baby but it wouldn’t matter anyway, he wouldn’t want the studio knowing what it would ALWAYS remind him of.
It still felt surreal; he’d thought he had his life all figured out. Open his own studio for awhile then when he was just about suffocated by those walls, he would find someone to run it as he travelled the world with Bel. He would then become one of the best travel photographers who always had his muse by his side. The world would not be ready for him, and he didn’t have the time to warn it.
Somehow all that had changed with a heartbeat.
He was scared but in his experience, scared was a good place to be.
He needed a steady source of income so he knew what he had to do. Anything to make sure that his wife to be, the mother of his child and child would be comfortable. If they chose to keep it.
And even if they didn’t, he needed one thing to be constant in all of this.
If that meant that things had to change then so be it.
They would be okay, if that’s the last thing he did.
The alarm went off; it was time!